The Everyday Cultivating of a Marriage

I am so very excited today to introduce you all to my friend, Jamie.  I remember sitting with her and discussing marriage last year with some other ladies from our homeschool support group and leaving so inspired.  Her enthusiasm is contagious.  And she is here today sharing a bit of her heart for how we can cultivate our marriages!  I’m a firm believer that when we work to build our marriage relationship that the whole family is strengthened as a result.  

I love that I get share with you some of the ways that my husband and I cultivate our marriage in the everyday.  Like some of you, we homeschool three out of our five with two toddlers in tow, so it would be very easy to let our marriage slip to the backburner.
We are absolutely not willing to let that happen because marriage happens to be a passion of ours.  Not just our marriage but yours and yours and hers over there.  Marriage is hard enough in real life.  I hope I can help encourage you today.

One of the ways that we make sure that our marriage is getting the time and attention it needs is by being fiercely protective of our time together.  It sounds really easy, yes?  {We are all nodding here.}   With our busy schedules, it takes real intention to keep bits of time for each other.  And I’m not just talking about planning date nights, although those are always good.  I’m talking about when you’re living day-by-day, down in the trenches.  Here’s a confession that might shock you… After our kids go to bed, I do nothing except be with my husband.  Did some of you faint?  Of course there are those nights that are the exception, but for the most part, that time is his.  Sometimes we read or watch tv or unload the dishwasher.  I let him decide because it’s his time.  If that means dishes are left in the sink or laundry goes unfolded, so be it.  We also get up early together to have time to pray and share a cup of coffee.  While some mornings it’s hard for me to pull myself out from under the protective layers of covers, it’s always worth it.  When can you squeeze out of your day just for your spouse?

Another way that we work on our marriage is by cultivating a sense of fun and excitement/adventure with each other.  I really love that I can be my complete and absolute silly self with my hubby and vice versa.  We laugh about the craziest things every time we’re together.  We have dance parties, bubble-blowing contests, races, play “Would You Rather…”, lip sync to every kind of music under the sun and make fun of people on tv.  Every couple is different and being silly might not be your thing.  But what makes you laugh as a couple?  Whatever it is, do it!  Flirt, get your sparkle back, remember why you fell in love in the first place.  Don’t be afraid to be foolish together.  When those tough days come, as we all know they do, being able to laugh will act as a pressure valve between the two of you.   The best sound that your kids can fall asleep to at night is the sound of their parents laughing together.
How do YOU cultivate your marriage in the everyday?