Ready for a new monthly challenge? This month we will focus on the third aspect of the historic code of chivalry. This one and the next are the two that our boys are drawn to the most. These are the clear-cut “hero” aspects of the code of chivalry.
It’s never to late to jump in! Read more about the 2018 Chivalry Challenge here. You can jump in here with this aspect of the code or set your own time frame. Each month in 2018 we will be focusing on an aspect of the knight’s historic code of chivalry as outlined in my book, Knights in Training: Ten Principles for Raising Honorable, Courageous, and Compassionate Boys. (aff link)
Issue your Boys the Challenge to Stand Against Injustice and Evil
Your boys are ready for this one because EVERY boy wants to be the hero. The beauty of challenging them to live by the code of chivalry is that it gives them opportunities to be the hero not just in that eventual season of manhood, but in this everyday season of boyhood that they are in right now.
Start by reading or re-reading chapter 8 and then issuing them the challenge. Recap what you have focused on so far and then read them the description at the beginning of chapter 8. It is also listed at the top of this month’s downloadable challenge forms here!
Shore up Foundations in Justice
But our boys can’t be the hero and take a stand against injustice or evil if they don’t know the difference between good and evil, between what is just and unjust. That is why giving them a strong foundation in what is right and good is essential.
I just finished reading one of the most popular books out there among late elementary and middle school boys. It grieved me. There was a whole lot of relativism and cynicism. Opportunities to be the hero were laced with justification for all kinds of immoral behavior that had a devastating affect on others. In our “you pick your own truth” culture, it is important that we ground our children in what is right and true.
I’d encourage you to take time with your kids to read a chapter from the book of Proverbs every day and talk about it. Focus on the themes of wisdom, justice, and truth. Study the Ten Commandments and talk about what it means to live that out in this day and age. Memorize Micah 6:8 and talk about its implications.
Compassion and justice can go hand-in-hand and you have opportunities to be respectful as you communicate the importance of embracing both truth and love.
Instead of giving them sketchy stories to immerse themselves in (just because everyone else is reading it) give them great books to feast on. I’ll be sharing some of our favorite adventure books next week if you need help finding better books.
The Bystander Effect
Another big theme from this chapter is talking to your kids about the bystander effect and the fact that the herd mentality is strong. Most people will do nothing to stand against injustice simply because they are waiting for someone else to step up and take the lead. Our kids need regular reminders that they can and must be that person who takes a stand and who helps out (because standing against injustice and defending and protecting the weak go hand-in-hand.)
How do we help them resist the bystander effect?
- Teach them the power of 1 – when just one person steps up, others often follow. With my older boys I’ve read to them from this section of the book on page 116 and just personalized it. Talk about the tale of two trains and ask them the question I posed in the book (pg 117) and see what they com up with.
- Start to develop situational awareness skills – Situational Awareness skills are an ongoing theme for a Knight in Training! Learning to read their environments both helps them to assess just from unjust situations and it also helps develop empathy by giving them the challenge to step in with action packed solutions, aka hero opportunities. Page 121 lists some fun activities to help hone these skills.
Look for conversation opportunities this month. I’ve shared several on this month’s free chivalry challenge download.
Encourage their battle play. Our boys are battle-wired. That that’s a good thing. Allow them to practice “being the hero” in this way. If you need inspiration, glance through chapter 5 (Physical Training for the Quest).
Read great books about heroes – both fictional and real – who step up and save the day. The Wingfeather Saga is one of our newest favorites that depicts a family who takes a stand against injustice. The Boys Who Challenged Hitler is a recent favorite in the non-fiction realm. (I’ll be sharing more next week). And of course you can find all of my book recommendations for the Chivalry Challenge here!
Stand Against Injustice Chivalry Challenge Download
I’ve included both a form with ideas listed as well as a blank form to write down your own for the following categories as they apply to this aspect of the code:
- Scripture to live by
- Conversations to have
- Books to read
- Things to do
- Make it a community affair
As I was developing a printable poster for this month’s theme, my home was split on which one they liked best, so I’ve included several options. Print your favorite or favorites out and put them up. We’ve been putting ours up in our dining area. It’s helped remind me to keep looking for conversation opportunities.
It’s been fun to hear your stories and how these truths are sinking in deep with your sons. Keep them coming! It is so amazing to see how you all are personalizing this challenge and even making it a community effort by starting Knights In Training clubs!
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